How to Accept the Apology You Never Received

I desperately needed to read this as I am still waiting for my soon to be ex husband to offer a genuine apology for his actions. Sadly, previous apologies were immediately followed by countless other incomprehensible actions, hurts and finger pointing. It is pointless to apologise and then do worse things than the crap previously apologised for.

I will work on moving on without waiting for him to acknowledge the devastation, hurt and heartbreak he has continued to cause.

Lessons From the End of a Marriage

In an ideal world, everyone that causes harm to another, either intentionally or unintentionally, would immediately offer up a genuine apology: accepting responsibility, acknowledging the pain, express empathy and remorse, immediately changing behavior and, if appropriate, making amends for the damage caused. But we know that rarely happens. And it never happens as quickly as we would like.

Instead, we receive a “sorry” tossed out with little thought and nothing to back it up. We hear, “I’ll do better” and better never comes. We may find that in place of an apology, we instead receive blame and misplaced anger as defensiveness leads instead of empathy. The apology may be discounted by the excuses that accompany it. We may see an utter lack of comprehension at the pain that was inflicted. Or we may just be listening to radio silence, waiting for an apology that never comes.

An apology that maybe we…

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